April 2012

Made For This.

April 30, 2012

I could never pull for Michael Jordan. I always chose to side with the the earnest and awkward super-athletes, like a Clyde “The Glide” Drexler. (Bucktooth, balding and gangly but he got it done.) Still, for me Kobe is must see TV. It’s really more akin to the aesthetic appreciation I have for a striking piece [...]

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Aww Nuts

April 23, 2012

Nut allergies are a Yuppie invention, according to Joel Stein writing for the LA Times;  mass hysteria made manifest, I tells ya! I don’t just wish I wrote this. I had to re-read it a few times to be sure I hadn’t.

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Damnit, I Just Complained About Not Enough This And Then, There’s This!

April 13, 2012

I was just bemoaning a lack of music I was digging but that’s mostly cause I couldn’t be assed to dig it out. (If they’d called themselves Niki & The Dove and they hadn’t delivered 80′s synthadelica – it’s a thing – they would’ve found themselves on the business end of a seriously frowny emoticon [...]

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Is That Cake Made Of Fruit, Fish and Beans? Follow-Up Question: Fuck Yourselves?

April 12, 2012

6 Creative Ways to Ruin Your Own Wedding — powered by Cracked.com If you feel like the only thing that might make those fuck-nuts insane wedding videos any more captivating is a sprinkle more salty language… stick around. ( I should add; the ways I miss MIchael Swaim’s time as a professional internet piss-taker are [...]

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Breaking News!

April 5, 2012

Breaking News: Aaron Sorkin, really good at writing grandiose dialogue and bromances! This Just In: His lady characters often have short hairdos and tomboy-ish qualities! …. if I want to live in a Sorkin scripted world, is that vaguely gay?

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Why Your Team Needs Its Own NBAsshole

April 2, 2012

(I wrote this originally for a big basketball site – that shall remain nameless – to break down the common element missing from current top-tier NBA rosters… basically, super aggressive sociopaths. The version they sent back was cut for excess profanity and first-hand anecdotes that seemed to “portray well-known players in an unflattering light.” So, [...]

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